The strep is back. I'm on another round of antibiotics, this time for THIRTY DAYS. Thirty days. I am wigging out a bit, because nothing like this has ever happened to me.

Gemini was sent out of town for work--first to Tulsa, then on to Dallas, and now he's in Reno. Tomorrow he's off to San Francisco, and then he may be home midweek for a few days. It would be nice to see him before J and I embark on our Big Summer Roadtrip Adventure next weekend.

He called me three times today from the road, which warms my heart. I miss him. I know that giving this relationship another chance is not the most popular choice I've made, and that my friends are concerned that I'll be hurt again. He hasn't always treated me well, and they think I can do better in this respect.

But, look: The man who treated me better than any man ever has, the man who had everyone convinced that he was such a nice guy . . . is GONE now. He was a big fake.

With Gemini, I know exactly what I have. I know what his challenges and blind spots are. I know that he loves me and that he's being honest with me. I can ask him anything and get a truthful answer. We have real conversations now about ourselves and about our relationship, the kind of conversations I feared we'd never have. I wished for that kind of intimacy, and now we have it.

I don't know what will happen. Maybe we will have to walk away from each other at some point. But maybe not. I'll know when I'm ready to know. I'm going to give myself all the time I need to know for sure, and I believe that's not a mistake. My life is still moving forward in every sense. Antibiotics and all.

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