That last entry was too much even for me. I'm not really THAT depressed, am I? Just because I have a dead-end boring-as-hell job, the passive-agressive poster child for a boss, and (apparently) a tattoo that says "DUMP ME" across my forehead? Heck no: some people have actual problems.

Wayne D_yer titled one of his books "You'll See It When You Believe It." I keep wondering if he's right. Even if he isn't, what would it cost me to just believe?

It wouldn't cost me anything, and I know that perfectly well, and I know there are lots of other reasons why a positive attitude is better than the kind I have, and yet I still can't bring myself to believe. Periodically I say, "Okay, okay," take a deep breath, and start to repeat a positive affirmation like, "I intend to attract the ideal people and the ideal relationships," and after the third or fourth word I start to cry instead.

I feel like I should keep trying, but I'm running out of tissues.

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